In the name of love
Life is lifey & kindness still counts
CW: There is a brief mention of suicide in the second bullet point below.
Since I last wrote here, I’ve been in a season of grief and joy. A season of life that left me untethered, my toes reaching for purchase on solid ground. A season when showing up with kindness felt even more important.
A quick list:
My daughter graduated summa cum laude from high school. The end-of-year activities were plentiful and joyful. My husband and I cried at the Tobys (her high school drama department’s version of the Tony Awards, named after the theater’s ghost) when the new drama director surprised us all by presenting her with the inaugural “Ada Sheeren Love and Kindness Award”. It will now be given each year to a graduating student who exemplifies those qualities.
A friend of my daughter’s - someone we all knew - lost her battle with depression. This was someone who was a mentor to my daughter her first two years of high school, someone she looked up to, a talented, smart, creative, super-high-achiever who was about to be the first person in her family to graduate from university, who finished her B.A. in two years at a top U.S. school, and whose family received her acceptance to graduate school in England shortly after she died. Her funeral was standing room only, filled with laughter, tears and singing, enveloped in the shock that comes with the death of a young adult just launching into life.
I helped my parents move from my childhood home. The home they moved into when I was a toddler. The home they lived in for 50 years. A home full of memories, treasured items, and hilarious finds tucked into the back corners of closets. A beautiful, unique 103-year-old home that became too much work to maintain. Thankfully, we had an incredibly kind human as our realtor, and the home sold to a lovely young family. It will be odd not to have the keys to it when I return to visit my parents this fall. I hope it is well-loved and cared for.
We visited my husband’s family in Nebraska. It was a quick visit but as always, full of good food and laughter. His 87-year-old aunt and her 96-year-old boyfriend were there at the same time. It’s humbling to watch them find love again in the final act of life.
My daughter turned 18, chopped her never-before-cut, waist-length hair, and threw a party where each guest was given a Disney character that matched their personality, and instructed to come in costume. We cleared our small living room so she could have the dance party she wanted, and my heart grew as I sat in the office with my husband and our dog, listening to these teens - some of whom I’ve known since kindergarten - sing and dance and fill the house with joy.
We drove a thousand miles to Vancouver, Canada, to drop her off at university and a thousand miles home. While there, we spent time with my brother and his family, and I saw friends from my theatre school days. As we left campus the final time, my heart stretched in ways I didn’t know were possible. I miss my kiddo in waves that threaten to knock me off my feet, but the ache is balanced by my excitement for her as she leaps into this next stage of life.
In honor of Ada launching into young adulthood and because it feels like the world could use this reminder, we’ve printed a version of the to-do list pictured above. As a newly minted 11-year-old, she popped into the kitchen one day with it in her hand and presented it to me.
I might have cried. (Okay, I definitely cried.)
It’s been taped to our kitchen cupboard ever since. This is what it looks like now, faded & dirty but with its essence unchanged.
I love it even more.
For years, I’ve wanted to turn it into something other people could stick to their fridge or tuck into an envelope for a friend, and now seems like a perfect time to add a little love boost to the world.
We scanned it, cleaned it up, and had it printed on 5x7 eco-friendly hemp paper. It’s got a matte finish and the back is blank, so you can choose to write on it like a postcard, tape it to a wall or frame it and set it on your desk.
Ada decided she’d like to use it as a fundraiser for World Central Kitchen, so $1 from the sale of every art card will go to them. (More if/when we’ve covered our costs.)
You can buy a card here. They’re $6 each.
I hope you love this sweet reminder from the mind and heart of a child as much as I do.
Aww. That sweet to-do list tells us everything we need to know about 11 year old, Ada. ♥️ Heartening to see she grew into a young adult embodying the same values.